Lumberjacks need a good axe to break up logs—and a few good jokes to break up the day!
For National Tell a Joke Day on Aug. 16, we asked the NAU community to send us their best jokes, and you wood not be-leaf the side-splitting, groan-worthy punchlines we received. Just like a ponderosa pine, these jokes are evergreen, so feel free to pass them on. You’ll be sure to have everyone rolling with laughter…or rolling their eyes.
From NAU alumna Carol Struck:
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Pylon.
Pylon who?
Pylon the food, I’m hungry!
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From Doug Chunglo, senior systems administrator at ITS Education Technology Consortium:
I have lots of Dad jokes. I keep them all in my dada-base.
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From Matt Van Schoick, assistant director at Campus Health Services:
A group of hunters was walking in the forest when they came upon a massive hole in the ground. The hunters were shocked at the size of the hole. They picked up the biggest rock they could find and threw it into the hole. Ten seconds later, they heard a loud noise of the rock finally hitting the ground.
Afterward, a goat came flying by at a blazing speed, knocking the hunters out of the way. The hunters looked at each other in confusion until a farmer came by and asked, “Have you seen my goat around here?” One of the hunters, still stunned from what had happened, replied, “Yes, I think we saw something run by.” The farmer scratched his head and said, “Well, he has to be around here somewhere. I had him tied up to that big rock.”
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From student Rachel Negovan:
I got this joke from my CHM 130 class – I give all credit to Brandon Cruickshank, who is the master joke teller and a wonderful professor.
Q: Where do bad rainbows go?
A: Prism. It gives them time to reflect.
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From student Leo Bennon:
I was walking down the street one day when a van pulled up next to me. The window rolled down, but I didn’t see anyone in the driver’s or passenger’s seat. I was concerned because this seemed strange. That’s when I saw two tentacles on the steering wheel and two more reaching out the window toward me. That’s when I realized: oh no … this is a SQUIDNAPPING.
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From Howie Asaki, part-time faculty member in the Department of Physician Assistant Studies:
An NAU professor tells his class, “There are two words that I don’t want to hear you say in this class. One is ‘gross’ and the other is ‘cool.’” A student raises his hand and asks: “So what are the two words?”
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From Robin Long, manager of CCC2NAU:
Q: What did the triangle say to the circle?
A: “You’re pointless!”
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From Cecily Combs, senior academic success coordinator at the Academic Success Centers:
Several famous classical composers are sitting in a room drinking, conversing and having a good time. Suddenly, Bach turns to Vivaldi aghast. “I forgot to add Mozart to the invitation!” he cries. As he rushes to leave the room and correct his mistake, Handel lazily waves him off. “Don’t worry about it,” Handel drawls. “Don’t fix it if it’s not Baroque.”